Let’s be real: telling teens to “get off your phone!” doesn’t work. Social media is part of their world. For our teens, social media is how they connect, learn, and express themselves.  So how can we help them use it wisely without sounding and being the villain?

There’s a way to help them navigate social media mindfully, and no, it doesn’t involve a complete ban.

1.  Start the Conversation, Not the Battle

Instead of becoming the enemy and banning social media out of the blue, talk to your teen about what they’re doing on it. Is it for learning, creativity, or just entertainment? Understanding their “why” helps guide them to use it more purposefully.

2. Set Healthy Boundaries Together

Instead of enforcing rules, involve your teen in setting healthy screen-time limits. It gives them ownership and responsibility over their habits. For example, “I’ll spend 30 minutes scrolling up  on TikTok after school, and then I’ll switch to doing homework” can be a much better strategy than enforcing a rigid rule that feels like punishment. When your teen has a say in the boundaries, they’re more likely to stick to them.

3. Be a Role Model

What adults do, Teens do! If we’re glued to our phones, constantly checking social media, it sends the message that it’s okay to get lost in the digital world. Model healthy habits, like setting phone-free times, taking social media breaks, or just being present during family time. Show them how to use social media in a balanced way by setting phone-free times and modeling healthy habits.

4. Encourage Real-Life Activities

Social media is great for staying in touch, but it can never replace real-life experiences. Encourage hobbies, sports, or family time to keep them grounded. This way, they can create a well-rounded life that isn’t centered solely around the screen. Plus, those real-world experiences will give them something to post about on their feed!

5. Be Their Guide, Not Their Warden

At the end of the day, we can’t control everything teens do online. But we can provide guidance, support, and resources to help them use social media in a positive and mindful way. Keep the lines of communication open and encourage them to have trusted mentors—whether it’s a teacher, coach, older cousin, or life coach—who can provide advice beyond just Mom or Dad.

If you’re worried about your teen’s social media habits, let’s talk! Book a free parent support session.